Urgent!

This is urgent... Time--> it's urgent, it's a precious thing. Seldom is a day of my life not carefully planned out. Even my days off of work are 34 hour blocks of time for me to conquer. After all planning my time off is a way to be sure I maximize my free time. I pride myself on getting a lot done i a day's work. I'm obsessed with efficiency. I stand in line and think of ways I could reschedule my day so things could be done quicker. Yes, when it comes to time, I'm the epitome of American.

It is hard to leave that sense of Urgency at home with you all. But I know I must or this trip will not be as successful as it could be. If I try to schedule and control everything I will overstep new boundaries. I don't want to try and make everything happen right away and miss what may have unfolded, I don;t want to be judgemental of people in a more laid back country.

I need to focus on stepping back and reflecting rather than bring caught up in inspiration and zeal. While I'm letting go of my schedule and plans I need to also let go of attempts to be and thoughts of a missionary without flaws or blemishes. For every extra hour of preparation, for every extra characteristic someone may demand of a missionary. There will be thousands even millions possibly sidelined from mission work because they're to average, too real, to foolish. And as they sit attempting to become something unattainable the world continues to go to hell without Jesus

God's mission isn't contingent upon my plans and strategies, but I don't;t want to be sidelined for it. God remains on the throne and continues his redemptive work with or without my frantic sense o urgency